New Year's Cowboy

The last day of 2014 arrived with a brisk cold wind and bright azure skies.  The weather report said to expect an arctic blast sweeping down from Canada later in the evening.  As always the weather lady reminded us to observe the four P's.  Take precaution with your pipes, plants, pets, and people.  It was like a nursery rhyme in my head that I couldn't quite shake.  I found myself saying it even during the summer months.  Someday I'm going to write that weather lady and tell her to stop with the damn cute comments, but for now I had bigger plans to attend to.
You could say I'm in the golden years of my life.  I spent the last thirty years married to my job.  My business card read:
Jackson Hunt
Senior Petroleum Engineer/Technical Advisor
Gallant Oil Company
Houston, Texas
Working fifty to sixty hours each week as a petroleum engineer left me little time to become attached to anyone.  I had passed up the chance for any long term relationship in exchange for a demanding job.  Working my way up the ladder of success from the oil boom of the early 80's in the Texas panhandle to earn money for an engineering degree and finally retiring as senior engineer for a large oil company based out of Houston left me a single man.  I had done well, made incredible money, but here I am lying in bed on the last day of 2014, and not wanting to crawl out from under the blanket and open the curtains to let in the morning sun.  I realized soon after retirement that I wanted, actually needed someone to share my world.  I longed for someone to love.
I thought about the weather report and the cold blast of air coming down from Canada, and for an instant almost talked myself out of plans that I had begrudgingly made for later in the evening.  I really didn't like social gatherings, but I had promised Ray Porter, an old friend, that I would come to his New Year's party and stay over the night.  Ray had done very well for himself in real estate, and he and his wife Barb owned a beautiful oceanfront home in Galveston.  It would be nice I thought to celebrate the new year overlooking the Gulf of Mexico, albeit no love interest to share it with.  Well, enough with self pity I thought as I crawled out of bed and made my usual breakfast of coffee and cinnamon toast.  At that moment the telephone rang, and I could see from the caller ID that it was Ray, probably calling to remind me of the party tonight.  "Morning Jack, how are you this fine day?" "Ray, I was just thinking of you and Barb.  How is your beautiful wife?"  "Oh she is fine Jack, she just wanted me to remind you of the New Year's evening bash we are having for a few of our closest friends tonight.  You are coming aren't you?"  Now was my chance to back out, but I thought that the least I should do would be to show up  and greet the new year in style, so I replied, "I wouldn't miss it for the world Ray!  By the way, you mentioned there were going to be other closest friends invited, that doesn't mean you and I aren't best friends anymore , does it?"  "Oh, no Jack, it's Barb's friend from California.  She recently divorced and she and Barb have been emailing each other lately and reconnecting.  She was actually Barb's roommate for a couple of years when she attended the University of Texas in Austin.  I thought I had mentioned her to you before Jack.  Well it doesn't matter; you'll get to meet her tonight.  I'll see you at seven, and remember you are our guest to stay over for the night."  "OK Ray, I'll remember to bring my teddy bear and blanket, I'll see you at seven."
The drive from Houston to Galveston was quicker than usual.  Not much traffic I thought, most offices were closed, families at home with loved ones. There I go again feeling sorry for myself. Arriving at the residence of Ray and Barb's I was impressed with the elegance of the Spanish architecture all the way from the private gate past the carefully manicured landscape, and up to the veranda of the grand home.  Barbara met me at the door with a big hug and a kiss and called to her husband, "Raymond, some old cowboy dragged himself up to the door looking for a drink.  You better get down here quick because he looks awful thirsty!"  I couldn't recall the last time I had been kissed by a beautiful woman, and it reminded me of an empty space in my life.  No time for melancholy moods I thought as I saw Ray coming down the stairway.  "Hey Jack you old roustabout, come in and make yourself at home.  It's been a long time, too long.  Let me take you out to the back deck and show you a view of the Gulf that will leave you breathless.  Oh, and by the way, there's someone I want you to meet."  Barbara giggled with delight as she followed both of us outside.
"Jack, let me introduce you to Ms. Sophie Ribault.  Sophie is the owner and operator of her own French bakery in San Diego...what is the name of your bakery Sophie?  Oh yes, I remember now, 'La Patisserie'.  Sophie, this is Mr. Jackson Hunt, the infamous Jackson Hunt!"  Sophie took my hand and with a big grin said, "Jack, may I call  you Jack?  I have heard so many wonderful things about you from Barbara; I am so pleased to finally meet you."  Sophie looked like an angel, with an elegance and ease that endeared me to her from the moment she said my name.  All I could do now was not say anything stupid.  "Sophie, please do call me Jack, and I am honored to make your acquaintance. Barbara tells me how much you mean to her, and any friend of Barbara's is a friend of mine.  So tell me Sophie, what brings you to Texas if I may ask?"  Jack, it's a long story of me needing to be with those who care about me.  Barb and Ray always supported me emotionally and I need their support now.  You see, my husband decided he didn't want to be married any longer.  He found himself a young Spanish senorita and took off for Mexico.  I guess I saw it coming.  It hadn't been a good marriage for a very long time, but I was so busy with the bakery that his leaving kind of snuck up and bit me on the butt.  I take partial blame for it, but I do believe things will work out for the best.  I'm sorry for talking so much Jack."  Actually I was glad Sophie opened up to me, although I was so enamored with her appearance that I probably only heard every other word she said.  I'm sure she said something about a bakery.  "Ms. Ribault, if I may be so forward, I would be pleased to take you on a walk along the beach if you are interested."  "Mr. Hunt, I would be honored.  I'll be ready in five minutes, I'll just need to grab a sweater, it's cold out tonight."  I took the next five minutes grabbing a bottle of wine, a bottle opener, and a blanket.  By the time I had my essentials we were off to the beach.
Sophie and I walked and talked about silly things, and before I realized it, we had been walking and laughing for more than an hour.  "You know Jack, we must be three or four miles from the house, I think we should turn around.  We need to be back to usher in the New Year with our hosts."  As we headed back towards the house Sophie said, "So if I said I was cold now would you mind lending me that blanket you have been carrying around for the past hour?"  I laughed, wrapped the blanket over her shoulders, and casually put my arm around her waist.  "You know there is room enough in this blanket for even a big cowboy like yourself Jack, that is if you are interested."  I was a cowboy, but I wasn't stupid.  I could take a cue just like a city boy, and with that Sophie and I began to grow closer. We made it back to Ray's home just in time to welcome in 2015.  A champagne toast with good friends, and now a romantic interest made me feel like this was going to be a great year.
As we prepared to retire for the night, I kissed Sophie on the cheek.  We both knew it was too early in our relationship to take it to another level, although we both knew it would come. "I'll see you in the morning Sophie...sweet dreams."  With a smile as big as Texas Sophie replied, "I'll see you in the morning cowboy."
Lying alone in bed that night I recalled a quote from an old friend of mine, a real cowboy.  He told me when I was first getting involved in the oil business, "Don't be afraid to go after what you want, or what you want to be, but just be willing to pay the price for it all."  At that moment I told myself that Sophie was worth it before drifting off into sweet slumber.  That night I dreamed of Ms Ribault and cinnamon toast.


The night sky is filled with twinkling stars
all containing stories.
Loneliness is coming down
like dew drops on the flowers.

As I'm calling for someone
that left me in searching for stars.
The old memories come back
and linger.

The only face I can see is me
who is lost in the past.
Flow, flow, when time flows away
what will I become?

Do I have to go on
this long journey alone?
Will I become a memory
tomorrow and the day after tomorrow?

Flip Flop Christmas

It's raining, and has been all day.  That's OK...we need it here in Pensacola.  There is plenty of good food to keep us warm and in the house today.  Lots of left over Christmas turkey.  Precisely why turkey and dumplings was planned and prepared for dinner tonight.

I started putting the meal together this morning by stripping the turkey meat from the bones, then cooking the carcass sans meat, slowly to arrive at a condensed dark brown consomme.  By 3 p.m. it was perfect.  Next a mirapois of carrots, onion and celery were added, and finally, carefully rolled home made dumplings were dropped into the bubbling pot of goodness.  Now the turkey meat was introduced into the broth.  By 6 p.m. it was done.
That's when it happened.  My wife who has been 'under the weather' and napping most of the day said, "I feel like pizza."
You think a protest from me would be in order, but oh no.  I've been married too long for that.  'That dog don't hunt' is how it would be said where I come from.  "I'll go to Pizza Hut honey!"  There, I said it.  Simple, quick, albeit somewhat painful.  I mean the meal I prepared...the rain!  Hey, wait a minute.  If I go out to Pizza Hut I can wear my new Christmas flip flops!  There are flip flops, and then there are cool flip flops.
So out in the rain and the chill and the dark to Pizza Hut I go.  I started singing this to the tune of 'Over the River and Through the Woods to Grandmother's house we go.  There we go, I'm in the Christmas spirit once again.  When I arrived at Pizza Hut I ordered her favorite, 'Super Supreme pan pizza.'  That's when it happened for the second time in less than an hour.  "I'm sorry Sir, we are all out of pan pizza."
I didn't let 5 seconds pass, and then asked, "You do serve beer here don't you?"  After an affirmative nod from the pimple faced boy behind the counter I asked him to bring me 2 drafts and set them down next to me at the PacMan machine situated by the door.
Forty minutes and several quarters later I remembered  why I took up this holy mission to Pizza Hut in the first place.  I drained the last few swallows from my pilsner glass and immediately began formulating an excuse for coming home late without that pizza pie.
Luckily for me a McDonalds was en-route on my way back home, and surprisingly it still has McRib on the menu.  My wife and McRib go way back.  Picking up that pork patty would be my ticket to freedom!
I arrived home an hour later with no pizza.  The inquisition began.
"Where have you been?"  "You smell like pizza."  "Do I smell beer?"  It's funny how these statements always seem to run together without giving you time to even explain things.  After a few more direct all knowing indictments I took a deep breath and said, "Well you see...I know how much you love the McRib.  Unfortunately, McDonalds has a new pizza burger that just came out.  It's making it's debut tonight.  Such a line of people to buy one too.  It's crazy baby!  The whole place smells of pizza."
I'll be eating SPAM for the next few days.  Oh...I did tell you I got a new pair of flip flops for Christmas didn't I?

My Choosing

I’m flying my flag on Christmas day,

and let me tell you why.

The reason is because I can…

So let Old Glory fly!

It’s a gift to me from those who served…

for those who stood the line.

A gift I proudly fly with pride,

for those who fought and died.

The stars and stripes on Christmas day

will fly so high and proud.

So when you pass on Twin Lakes Lane

shout “Freedom” strong and loud!

So Santa, if you lose your way

as Pensacola passes south,

just look out for Old Glory

to guide you to my house.

Thankful I can celebrate the birth of Christ which is my choosing.  God Bless us all.

Twelve Things I Learned in 2011

Dont' tell me about your 'Prostrate', until you learn to spell it correctly.  And then don't tell me about it until you are at least fifty years old.  I don't want to know.

You can't drink three beers without excusing yourself to the bathroom.  

Don't hold grudges.  Please don't.  People get older, some get sick, some die.  If you are mad, just let it go.  You'll be a better person for it.

Karma lives and is at your door.  If it's good let it in.  If it's not, it will bite you in the ass.

Be a child with a child.  You know you want to.

Suck your stomach in when you go to Walmart.  There are too many people who don't.  Someone will thank you for it.

A good morning kiss will set the pace for the rest of the day.  If your significant other isn't going to initiate it, then it's up to you.

Begin the day with a prayer to God.

Give to those less fortunate even if it's only a smile.

Be true to yourself first.

Do not lie, cheat, steal, or tolerate those who do.

Yes, Virginia...there is...keep it going.  

Crossing to Benzaitendo

Benzaitendo is a temple named after the Hindu goddess Saraswati, the goddess of knowledge, music, and creative arts.

I had the opportunity while living in Okinawa and then again visiting Okinawa in 2011 to visit the temple.
The temple was built in 1502, and houses ancient manuscripts gifted by the King of Korea to the King of the Ryukyuan Islands.
I hope you enjoy the picture and the accompanying poetry.

Crossing to Benzaitendo

A leap of faith, a step of hope,

crossing to Benzaitendo.

A traverse of an ancient moat

along a bridge of stone I go.

In search of bygone manuscripts

gifted from a long dead king.

The words were whispered from his lips.

“Behold the truth” an angel sings.

What secret will the words unveil?

Will I return a different man?

My eyes will see, my mouth will tell

the  mystery of this ancient land.

In the center of the temple

lay the book upon a stone,

it’s binding frayed and simple,

it’s pages brown and over-worn.

As I read aloud with every breath,

the words passed down spoke loud and clear;

the joy of love, the pain of death,

the knowledge of five thousand years.

The wisdom of the erudite king,

to follow in his righteous plan.

It’s love, it's trust, it's everything. 

It's how we treat our fellow man.

A choice to make, yes you must know,

to do your best and lend a hand.  

Crossing to Benziatendo…

my journey to a foreign land.

A Gift From Angkor Wat

A simple Buddhist pendant to wear around my neck is a small part of this blog.  I have requested it from my sister who is in Cambodia.  Her destination is Angkor Wat, once a Hindu temple built within a city, and then later a Buddhist temple.  Angkor Wat is the largest religious building in the world.  A temple of the highest order, a religious mecca.  From this temple a simple Buddhist pendant lays wait with my name upon it.  That's the small part of this story.

The larger chapter of this story is my journey into Buddhism.  The steps along the way for me personally to remember and live within the moment.  To remember to breathe and exhale with purpose, and to pay it forward.  I constantly remind myself to live in the present.  The past cannot be changed, and the future is not to worry over, as only the present will guide my steps into the future.

A cup of tea, a clear mind, and living my life in a way that is beneficial to myself and the universe is my choosing.  That is the larger chapter in my life.  How many chapters I have left is unimportant.  If asked what Zen is, I will reply Zen is now.  Zen is the coolness of the air I breathe in.  Zen is the warmth of the air as I breathe out.  

The Buddha will travel a long distance to find my necklace, his new home.  My wish is that he is happy with me, and I with him.

A poem perhaps to reflect upon and close my blog for tonight.

The Nothingness of Tea

Now is all I have

as tea is in the making

unimportant past and future

leave me recalling Zen

Quietly exhaling the day in to air

no words need be spoken

between friends

who met by chance

The tea cup offered

thick green froth

steaming hot

rejuvenating my soul

Bittersweet warmth

kindness between friends

I realize

now is all I have

Sentient

A butterfly visited me this morning by the pool. He stopped long enough to let me take his picture, then I gently cupped him in my hands and released him from the enclosed pool.  I think he was tired because he didn't resist his capture.  As he flew away he looked beautiful against the blue sky.  Our host, my sister in law who is a devout buddhist, heard about my encounter and was happy to learn I released him.  "Something good will come of this," she said.